Sunday, April 27, 2008

The Hallway of Change

It's so funny to watch him be older, and older every time we go up to the hospital. Sorry if that sounds weird. We were walking down that main hallway a bit ago, and he was holding my hand, walking beside me. It hit me like a brick in the head, all that has happened in that hallway.

I've walked down the hall so much, I can't even tell you. I've had every possible emotion in that hall way. I've walked down it, crying, stressed, scared, starving, excited, worried, happy, mad, exhausted, showered, and wanting a shower. I've walked down it, pregnant, and scared about the future. Pushing a stroller with a newborn in it and trying desperately not to let anyone breath on him. Carrying him in his carseat. Holding him on my shoulder. On my hip. Daddy holding him. And now with him walking beside me, holding my hand.

I've walked down it, without him, and only his name on my chest. Sometimes in red, sometimes in black, but always with a pink bracelet.

I've walked down it, and been greeted by friends. We are often greeted by hospital staff, who knew him as a baby. They joyously greet him, and he looks at them like they are crazy. :)

I've walked down it late at night, and early in the morning, when we are the only ones in the hallway. And in the middle of the day, when there are so many people coming and going you can get dizzy.

It is just amazing to me, how much he has changed, in just two years. I know I have 3 other kids, but nothing compares to this. I've never had such a range of emotions in one place. For those of you who frequent PCMC, I bet you have had all these same emotions, walking down that main hallway. I bet if not PCMC, it's another place similar.

He is a totally different kid, then we thought he'd be. The hallway, as well as the front and back lobby, are getting a fresh coat of paint, new murals on the walls, and new flooring. I think the timing, is rather appropriate, as Jack blossoms into a little boy.


Erika said...

Although I haven't been down that hallway nearly as often as you have, I have had all of those emotions the few times I have been down it. What an amazing journey these little people take us on!

Mandy said...

Me too Me too!!! Beautifully put!

annafowler said...

Oh, this is precious. You guys really have come such a long way- all of you! Not only has Jack changed immensely, but so have you.

Hoping we can bump into you guys again someday in those hallways.

Sarah said...

Very well said.

You even walked down that hall with him, to come visit us.


Candace said...

Wonderfully put.

Last week Sage and I were walking that same hall (probably on the day this pic was taken) and we saw you, Jack, and Emma. Because we have not met, I didn't want to freak you out.

Cindy said...

That was absolutely beautiful. Thanks for sharing.

Becky said...

I read this when you posted the link in the HPE group. I tried to post a comment after reading it, but to no avail. This is beautiful. I can relate completely, and to a different hall way...

Thanks for passing on the link. You're an incredible writer. Maybe one day we'll get together and write a book or

Rebekah Peterson said...

Well written. I can relate so much! Sending hugs.